Quotes from the first season of Party of Five collected by Patpv@aol.com


Claudia to Artie: "I'm eleven years old, I'm too young to be living with someone."

Julia, after Justin destroyed the poem: "I almost had it memorized."

"I guess I'm just a victim of my own sexuality!" ala Claudia. It seems to fit my life in many ways...:)

Bailey: "God, Julia, when did you become such a bitch!"

Julia: "You bet!" (Responding to Bailey's...I hope your date with Justin was worth me failing...)

Julia: "...we have to remind each other..."

Claudia: "I love you, Charlie" (tears)

My favorite line so far is from last week's episode when Bailey asked Claudia who the camera was from and she said "who wasn't it from!"

Bailey: "I told her about everything I did with Jill, I just told her that I did them with you."
Will: "You told her that we slept together?!?"

Favorite: "One thing you've got to learn, if you're going to be Jewish, you have to stop aplogizing all the time" (something like that) said by Artie to Claudia, when she was thinking of converting.

"Do it! Do it! Find someone and finally do it!" From Julia's Short Story (About Bailey)

"...I really a lot respect you..." -Julia in one of her many apologies

"Claudia, go to your tent!" -Charlie

"Hey!....(OH!)Jill...(uh)" -Bailey when Jill showed up at the coffee house

"JULIA!" -Bailey & Charlie & Claudia (separately)

Charlie: I hired a new nanny, and I think this one'll work out.
Julia: References?
Charlie: Great references.
Julia: And what about the tempation issue?
Charlie: I don't think that will be a problem.
Bailey: Oh? What's her name?
Charlie: Bill.

Claudia: "Charlie do you know anyone who's gay?"
Charlie: "Yeah, I have some gay friends, why?"
Claudia; "Cause Ross just told me he's gay, and I'm having trouble with it."
Charlie: "Claude, I can't say that I totally understand everything about it, but if someone is your friend it shouldn't matter."

Charlie: "Maybe you'll like it now." (broccoli)
Claudia: "What, is it going to change? Are you some kind of cooking genius? My tastebuds change overnight? I don't think so."
(Believe me, Claud, I know where you're coming from!;))

Jill: "Guess who?!"
Bailey: "Jill?!...oh...uh... I gotta go."
"I'm really a good guy. I mean, I use my turn signals....even in parking lots I know I'm supposed to, but a lot of people don't." -Bailey to Jill, speaking on behalf of all us "nice guys" everywhere!!!

Charlie: "Claude, why don't you try eating vegetables?"
Claudia: "Why don't you try putting the toilet seat down?"
"Excuse me, I'm going to make a note of that...JERK!" -Jill (to/about Bailey)

"Can I have a butt check here..." -the guy at the party with Charlie and Kirsten

Julia, CUTE HAT!! (cute girl!) -in the scene with Charlie at his "new place"

"No...(that special laugh)...I mean...yeah, it's about sex" -Julia (same scene)

"Are there any problems here that need to be solved?" -Bailey to Jill (in her bed)

"...I didn't bring my bathing suit..." -(Enough said)

BEST LINE(last line): Charlie Salinger: "So...let's go home..."

Bailey: "Why are you crying?"
Claudia: "Because. Why aren't you?"

Kirsten: "It's either him or me [who has to leave]."
Charlie: "But Kirsten, where will you go?"

Bailey: "She's dead. Jill. She's dead. Her mom found her, in her bedroom. There's was some... cocaine. Her heart... stopped." (Way to go, Scott. I had goosebumps all up my legs in a second!) "Anyway, that's it. She's dead."

Julia: "Whoosh!"

Griffin: "I want to scream at her. She's, like, dead, and I want to scream at her. Don't you?"
Bailey: "Sometimes. And sometimes I just want to hold her again."

Kirstin: (To Ross) "Okay, I have a rattle, a crib, and... a dog. Every baby needs a dog. Take the dog, Ross."

Charlie: "You are not going to have sex in this house, Bailey. Mom and Dad made it impossible for me and I'm going to make it impossible for you."

Kirstin: "You should name the baby after someone."
Claudia: "Yeah, like a musician or something."
Kirsten: "Or a relative. What's your mom's name, Ross?"
Ross: "Mabel." (Pause)
Claudia: "Mabel?" (One of those 'you had to be there' lines.)

Jill: "Julia, this is a shirt that guys named Barney wear."

Jill: "You always use a real established brand, right? I mean, not like Jerry's Condoms or anything?"

Bailey: "I just want you to know that, no matter what happens, I am never having sex again."

Claudia: "You'll never guess who's having a baby!" (Great look from Jill and Bai)

"...and you're the guy with the black jeep, right?" -Jill to Bailey in the "hang-out", after conveniently getting rid of Will by saying he had a phone call.

Griffin: "So what do you think made her so arrogant to believe she could go back to it one more time?"
Bailey: "I don't know man. I wish I knew. You have to let your anger go, Griffin. You can't hold on to it. It will eat at you, I know!" (when Bailey and Griffin spoke over Jill's burial site)

Julia: (Giving the jacket to Griffin.) "It's from Jill. She told me about losing it in LA. She was going to get it for you."

Bailey: "Charlie, have you ever dated an older woman?"
Charlie: "Yeah, sure!"
Bailey: "How do you get something like that started?"

Charlie: "It was my fault. I was on a date, and I got home late. I was supposed to babysit my baby brother. I remember my father's last words to me- NEXT TIME BE ON TIME! And my mother, she just handed Owen to me, and didn't say anything. God, if I would have been there they would have still been alive."

Walter Alcott: "Don't do this to yourself. Its not your fault. If I can do one right thing in all of this its to tell you that you are the hero in this son!"

"If someone is actually willing to love someone else, that is not so easy to do. It's so hard and it doesn't happen that often." -Bailey to Ross's case worker regarding the adoption.

"God, what do you want me to do, hold your hand?" -Julia in the trig scene when Bailey got mad because she was leaving for a second to change for a date with Justin. I feel for ya, Jul.

Kirsten: "Seattle. It rains in Seattle."

Charlie: "...and Claudia, she's so young. Kids that age, well, they make new best friends in like half an hour, right?" (WRONG!)

I have to add this one, because it was Jill Holbrook's last line: (Sorry, it's paraphrased, but reasonably close, I think.) "Someday, I want to have a store just like this one. Do you think I could do it, Bailey? I mean, do you think I'd be good at it?"

Kirsten: "God, Charlie, show some responsibility. Show some sensitivity."
Charlie: "Well, make up your mind, Kirsten. Is this the responsibility lecture or the sensitivity lecture?"

Charlie's friend in bar: "She told me I had a cute butt. What is that if not serious commitment?"
Charlie: "I think maybe you should re-examine your standards."

Bailey: (to Jill) "You were on speed. The last thing you should do is something that requires you to stay up for 36 hours!"

Claud: "I don't know, Ross. It's kinda screwed up. I mean, maybe I might be a great violinist one day, if I don't get, like, run over by a bus or something, but right now I just want to be a normal kid who happens to be good at violin, a kid who takes lessons from someone she really likes. Cuz that's the part that makes me happy. And that's kind of what I need right now. At least until we go."
Ross: "3 o'clock, as usual?"
Claud: "And maybe we could try the Bach double in D minor?"
Ross: "I don't know, Claud, that's a pretty tough piece."
Claud: "Don't worry. I'll take the hard part." (An all-around great scene.)

Charlie: "I made that. And someone liked it enough to spend $600. That means something. It really does."

Bailey: "I'll turn it down a little so it doesn't damage your eardrums. But the point is, I really need you to be quiet. It's Pearl Jam, so you'll grow up with good taste." (Now that's a way to raise a baby!)

Claudia: (As Ross walks in.) "That's okay. It's a very slow read." (As she hands him the box of cereal.) "Sorry, I ate all the crunch berries."
Ross: "That alright. I like the way it sticks to your teeth." (I'm with ya, Ross.)

Kirstin: "Will you bury (marry) me?"
Charlie: "Will I bury you?"
Kirstin: "Not BURY, bury (marry)."
Charlie: "Well I guess when the time comes..."
Kirstin: "No, I said will you bury (marry) me?"
Charlie: "You're asking me to marry you?"
Kirstin: "Yes!"
"...I've lived here before. Not in this exact apartment, but I've been here so many times. The wild parties, the all-nighters...I thought I would try it again, but it's not what I wanted..." -Charlie

Charlie: "I've been here before. I mean, not here, in this house, but in this life. And... and I thought I wanted to go back to it, I thought I'd like it again. But, it's just not what I want." (Paraphrased but since it's one of everyone's favorites I couldn't leave it off.)
"Extra points for creativity?" -Jill, to the Highway Patrolman, after trying to get Bailey out of a speeding ticket.
"No, but the shark was a nice touch." The Patrolman's response.

Claudia: "Did you know that 60 million sperms are deposited in a woman each time she has intercourse? 60 million!"

Bailey to Claudia in market shopping for sanitary napkins: "Here's one with wings."

Charlie to Kirsten: "Here I am, 24 years old with four kids, so why don't you share mine?"

Joe: "Salinger; Party of Five!"

Justin: "I've been trying to maintain the illusion of a private life!"

"...she just made a mistake. I keep trying to make it mean more, but it doesn't." -Bailey at Jill's grave.

Bailey: "Just one date, give me one date. It will be kind of like a taste test."
Kate: "I don't know, Bailey."
Bailey: "It will be like you're seeing San Francisco for the first time. Have you ever been on a cable car?"
Kate: "Yes"
Bailey: "How about Alcatraz?"
Kate: "Been there."
Bailey: "Have you ever taken in a nudie show in North Beach?"
Kate: "No!" (laughing)
Bailey: "Good! Then we'll start there!"

Unknown female name: "Wow, that's real interesting, Barley!"
Bailey: "Its Bailey!"
Unknown female name: "What?"
Bailey: "Bailey, my name is Bailey!"
Unknown female name: "Whatever!"

"Bailey, help me please, I can't do this without you, don't go. Please stay here. I can't do this alone." -Jill

"I am three weeks into a treatment center at my mom's hospital. I'm clean. I didn't want to see you until I could say that." -Jill

Police Investigator: "What color was it?" (The robber's jacket.)
Claud: "Blue."
Artie: "Green."
Claud: "Blue-green?"
Claudia: "We're going to get split up." (Waaaaah! Wonderfully delivered line, Lacey.)

Julia: "Good things happened to guys who wore this jacket, Griffin."

Bailey: "We are NOT going with you!"

Charlie: "Everyone up there called me Mr. Salinger. I kept looking behind my shoulder for my father."

Bailey: "Ten degrees, huh? We can fix that."

Kirsten: "We don't have to have sex every night, Charlie." (one of my all-time faves.)

Charlie: (Paraphrased but I couldn't leave it out. To Owen) "Once upon a time there were two people, a man and a woman. They met one night and fell in love and decided to get married. The man asked her if she wanted to have any children. The woman said, "Sure. How about five?"